Some Funny joke copied from my freind!

(1)

Wife: Honey….. What are You Looking for?
Husband: Nothing.
Wife: Nothing…?? U’ve been reading our marriage certificate for an hour??
Husband: I was just looking for the expiry date.

(2)

Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?
Hubby: When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your
picture and the problem disappears.
Wife: You see how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
Hubby: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, “What other problem can there be greater than this one.

(3)

Q - What is the Difference between Mother and Wife?
A - One Woman brings you into this world crying… and the other ensures that you will continue to do so.

(4)

Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends.
You order what you want, and then when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that.

(5)

Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is completely finished.

(6)

A little boy asked his father, “Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?”
The father replied, “I don’t know son, I’m still paying.”

(7)

A man placed an ad in the classifieds: “Wife wanted.”
The next day he received a hundred letters.
They all said the same : “You can have mine.”

(8)

A woman was telling her friend, “I made my husband a millionaire.”
“And what was he before you married him?” asked the friend.
“A billionaire.” she replied.

(9)

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

(10)

How do most men define marriage?
An expensive way to get your laundry done free.

(11)

A wife asked her husband: “What do you like most in me my pretty face
or my sexy body?”
He looked at her from head to toe and replied: “I like your sense of humour”.

Although I am the one who post them, I don’t believe in some. Just a good way to change your mood.

Feel free to comment or put other jokes which you know.

A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided not to report it since the thief was spending much less than his wife did.

(12)

Someone said: I haven’t spoken to my wife in 18 months - I don’t like to disturb her.

(13)

Someone bought his wife a new car. She called and said, “There was water in the carburetor.”
He asked her, “Where’s the car?” She replied, “In the lake.”

So, there is still no offence to girls!! Peace..